Competition

Having younger siblings, competition is a natural and inevitable part of life. Ever since they were born, I feel like I have had to compete with them for attention from my parents, attention at school, from friends and relatives. In school, my goal was to have greats that were always better then my sister's, so that it was her and not me that got in trouble. I wanted to be the better daughter and this was an easy way for me to do it. On an even more extreme level, I tried my best to be better at art than her. Both of of parents went to art school, so art has been a major part of our lives. I think by always trying to be better I snuffed out her creative flame and hogged it for myself. But at the same time, while I worked hard, she made friends and had a lot of fun that it would take me years to discover. 

But probably the most memorable instance of competition that I can remember was when I was in elementary school. Both me and my sister were in the same school, since she is only two years younger than me. I remember she came home with a story she'd written in class and both my parents praised her for her creativity. I heard them and knew I needed to write something better. I came home a few days longer with an even bigger story with illustrations and everything. They praised me just the same and I felt like I had won. When I look back on this, I sometimes think that it didn't affect my sister, for her it was a simple assignment in class, but to me it was about being the best daughter. I wonder where she could have been if I had let her take the spotlight? Maybe she'd be in my place here at Ithaca and I'd still be at home. And then other times I think that it was meant to happen, this is what I was meant to be good at and it was because of my sister that I found my path.

In the end, we both got our stories hung up on the fridge for a while before they were carefully tucked away in a box to be kept.